Don't be weird

[Ralphus]

This isn't a political post, but I'm using this example to prove a point. A few months ago, Minnesota Governor (and now Vice Presidential candidate) Tim Walz made headlines by referring multiple times to Donald Trump and JD Vance as "weird." Now he could have said all kinds of things about those two, including that they're both terrible candidates and repulsive human beings, and he would have been right. But for some reason, it was the word "WEIRD" that seems to have stuck in people's consciences. Why is that?

When I was in college back in the mid 1980s, a fellow student from my film class approached me and said he wanted me to be in his student film he was making. I barely knew the guy; we never hung out and I definitely did not consider us friends but I told him sure, I would help him out. He didn't tell me what the part was. I found out when I got there that I was to play a drive-thru attendant who gets shot in a robbery.

Years later, this guy's movie achieved some sort of cult status among independent films and even got a BluRay release. I got hold of a copy and watched my scene with the director's commentary track on. And the director and his commentary partner proceeded to laugh at me and the director said, "He was so weird! He was in my film classes and he was kind of a weird guy, and so I'm like 'Dude! I'm gonna rob you on film!'" Just for the record, I didn't mind playing that role, didn't consider it demeaning, and look back on appearing in the movie as a fun life moment.

But it was a bit disappointing to find out, years later, that the reason I was cast was essentially because the director considered me "weird" and he wanted to make me look bad in his movie. (BTW, on the commentary track, he called another actor a "cunt" and said nobody liked him and so he had instructed the actor playing opposite him to spit in his face in multiple takes on film, just to humiliate him.)

Oh, and here's a personal message for that director. I'd rather be weird than a fucking asshole.

When I was much younger, I remember talking to girls and saying something that they perceived as different and being dismissed by the words, "You're weird!" I was a kid then and didn't know how to handle the sting. Cruel words hurt. They diminish your self-worth and it's hard enough being a kid without feeling like you're a social outcast. Years have gone by and I'm in my 60s now but every time I think back to those days, it still hurts.

I guess I *am* weird. I'm a loner who lives by myself, I don't have a lot of friends, I even have sort of a weird job. And...wait for it...I have weird fetishes. Like everyone else here, my sexual proclivities aren't exactly what most would consider normal. Most porn...most NORMAL porn, involves women and men fucking. But I find that boring as hell. Instead, I seek out material where women are tied up, abused, tortured, raped. Pretty sick stuff for your average heterosexual man.

Of course, I'm not open about it in public. This is the only place where I feel comfortable talking about it. I did confide in my one-time girlfriend all my deep dark fantasies and she tried to keep an open mind, but eventually she told her sister and her family and I'm sure they all consider me weird, too. And I'm not really seeing my girlfriend any more, except as friends. We've drifted apart. Maybe I'm just too weird for her?

The bottom line is, I'm convinced that being "weird" is not necessarily a bad thing, as long as you don't hurt anybody, but don't expect most people to accept or understand you. People are naturally going to be uncomfortable with anything they consider to be different from them. What is "normal" anyway? Being weird is much more interesting.

[cluseb]

LET'S GET WEIRD
https://youtu.be/T0F6zVa54bI

[wulf]

In the theme of a common saying, weird is in the mind of the beholder. It also requires a comparison to something or someone else, and is a matter of opinion and perception.

I don't like labels, especially when applied to people, because they are too vague for a complex human being.

[bakerboy]

... yet has a lot of friends.... " Keep on trucking Ralphus"

[letvor]

I think it's respectable that you had the will to help a fellow student you barely knew. His later comment reflects his spirit and humanity—his shame.

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The attribute weird is assigned by the masses, all those who belong to a certain social mold, those who are in the majority. I'm weird because I think Aiko Koo's story is the sexiest thing ever , and a vegetarian in a tribe of cannibals is weird because he likes carrots.

The majority can be compared to a herd. Sheep graze within a fence; the fence shapes the herd—just as prescribed social norms shape the human spirit. Do we want to shape our spirit just to belong to the herd?

As a child, you want to be part of the herd. You desperately want to belong. You try so hard to be like everyone else that it’s (physically) painful. You want to play soccer. You want to get invited to someone’s birthday party. You want everything others have… But as you grow up, you realize that the herd was never your destiny.

Equality is formless. A drop of water in a glass. A grain of sand in the desert. An identical mass of nothing. Why will white chickens peck a colorful one to death? Because it’s different, and there’s no place for it in their flock.

I believe that every person should be who they truly are, an authentic existence, not a copy of what the society they live in dictates.

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Are we going to stay weird here?
Werd!

[localroger]

"I'd rather be weird than an asshole" -- words to live by.

I have observed over the years that it is people who are "weird" who have actually thought about their place in the world, and what their fantasies and expectations mean in terms of reality and their inner life. "Normal" people, by contrast, have never been forced to have this inner conversation, and the number of people who have been tortured and killed and otherwise abused in real life because a mob didn't like their sexuality or their taste in literature or their political beliefs far exceeds the number of people who have come to real-life peril at the hands of actual sadists. Letvor would be able to put out a post every day until the end of the time if it were otherwise.

[Darthsaad]

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[yyy02]

...I guess I *am* weird.

Yeah, I too am "weird" in that sense. I never had a part in a movie, however. speaking or otherwise.
Sometimes I think that people that knew me had a sense that something was "off", even though they couldn't put a finger on it.
Oh well. I too, am "weird". These days I own it, though I don't go out of my way to show it. I just accept it as part of who I am.
And thanks for sharing, Ralphus.