A review by Thomas Chaser

Ok, GIMP fans. Back in the good ol’ days of silent movies, there was the cliché of the beautiful woman tied to the train tracks by an evil do-er. The hero in the white hat always managed to save her just as the train was charging down the tracks, its whistle screaming with hysteria at the tragedy that was about to unfold. Whew!

So how well does that storyline stand up to today’s audience? Teraz Films decided to make a 7-minute film to find out.

Nobody does rubber masks as well as Teraz Films, and this is no exception. In fact, I think a lot of the low-budget GIMP films would benefit from making slightly-abnormal rubber masks for its antagonists. It would certainly cut-down on casting issues for bit players whose main job is to torture the beautiful girl(s). And in this film, Teraz doesn’t disappoint, because right off the bat we get this guy walking his down along the tracks:

Kind of creepy, right?

Anyway, he hears a noise; someone crying out for help. He looks down the tracks and sees a beautiful woman tied spread-eagle to the rails. Now, quick, you see this and what’s the first thing you think of?

That’s right. Your decision tree. Is she hot? Yes, proceed with Plan A. No, go to Plan B and call the cops. Next question: Will anybody see me? If ‘Yes’, call the cops. If ‘No’, proceed with Plan A. Final question: Can I get away with it? If ‘Yes’, Plan A looks like a winner. And that’s exactly what he thinks, too.

He decides to get a closer look at the attractive young woman, just to see if she’s worth having a good time with.

Now, at this point, a thought popped into my head, which went something like, “Is bestiality illegal in all jurisdictions?” followed quickly by, “Just how far over the edge of sanity have I slipped?” But don’t worry. The dog is just bi-species curious and decides to sit and watch this strange game the humans are playing.

What follows next is about five minutes of her begging as he cops a free feel of the merchandise.

Then, just when you wished he’d hurry up and get on with things, here comes the train! The victim, played by the lovely Kristina Chrystalis, begins to really beg and plead as the rubber-faced old man continues to cop a feel of some tender young female flesh.

Now comes the decision tree again, with a bit more complexity. "Do I have time to fuck the girl?" If “Yes”, then proceed with Plan A. If “No”, then “Do I have time to finger her off?” If “Yes”, then proceed to do so. If “No”, then get the fuck away, because that light you see is the train bearing down on the girl.

Ok, I won’t give away the ending so let me get straight to the criticisms. First, the image clarity isn’t exactly cutting edge. My guess is the camera operator didn’t understand about focal length and shutter speed and ISO settings, because, while there’s a tremendous depth-of-field, there’s a consistent blur whenever anything moves, including the victim. Second, why is the girl on the tracks? Is she a mob doll for a rival gang and they’re executing her to send a message to their enemies? Third, I’m pretty sure if the old man had cut her loose right off, she just might have given him some good lovin’ just for his troubles. Then again, the old man probably figured she was a mob doll for a gangboss and didn’t want to be hassled for not letting her get whacked by the train. Old people are wise that way.

Anyway, I give credit to Teraz for bringing some new life back into an old plot device, and Ms. Chrystalis does a lovely job of being lovely, as well as being scared, terrified, frightened, and pleading to be saved. Such range! She’s surely destined for bigger things.

Overall, the short film is just that – a short film. I won’t give away the ending because it really does have some surprise to it. As far as GIMP-ness goes, it delivers to a degree. I just wish it had a backstory to make the suspense that much more dramatic. Or better yet, have the victim’s view of things the whole time. I imagine the story would be much better that way – “Oh, look! Here comes an older gentleman out walking his dog. Surely he’ll save me! Wait, what? What are you doing? Won’t you free me? Quit creeping me out by copping a feel! Oh shit! Here comes the train! Help me! Help me!” Or something like that.

Overall, I knock it mostly because it lacks a backstory and should’ve been told entirely from the perspective of the victim. The shoddy camera work doesn’t help, either, particularly in such a visual medium. The CGI work is pretty good, and the victim is lovely, which counts for a lot.