You know how you'll be watching a movie, and find yourself thinking how much better you would have done it? I know we all do that with GIMP movies. We'll see someone tie a girl's hands in front of her and we'll think how stupid that is. Or we'll watch a rape where the victim's clothes are all still apparently on, and we'll think WTF? Well, it is not much of an exaggeration to say that Stuart Gordon's Re-Animator is how a horror movie should be done. It hits all of its marks perfectly. Not only is it one of the funniest scary movies ever, it is bloody, gory, spooky, creepy, suspenseful, and sexy. And the actors are all superb.

Its claim to fame, though, is its sexual assault scene. Which is what I am going to spend all my time describing, with helpful pictures to illustrate its sublime awesomeness.

First, though, the story in a nutshell. Re-Animator is loosely based on an HP Lovecraft story. The movie deals with Herbert West, a youthful mad scientist obsessed with bringing the dead back to life. He runs afoul of Dr Hill, his egotistical instructor at university. There's also West's roommate, who is dating the dean's pretty daughter, played by an innocent and vulnerable-looking Barbara Crampton. And of course the egotistical Dr Hill also lusts after the dean's pretty daughter, because Barbara Crampton is also smoking hot. West perfects his formula, Dr Hill tries to steal it, and there is mayhem and death and re-animation galore. I won't spoil the plot, which is clever and twisted, but I will spoil the sexual assault scene.

The dean is turned into a mindless zombie-like creature by the re-animation formula. When Dr Hill and West have their showdown, West ends up decapitating Dr Hill, and then re-animating the head and body separately, which leads to Dr Hill's body escaping with his head. Dr Hill's head sends the mindless dean out to fetch his pretty daughter. The dean returns with his unconscious daughter and lays her in the lab table.

The dean fastens his daughter's wrists and ankles to the table with leather restraints, although he fails to fasten one wrist securely.

Just before he starts munching, though, West reappears and distracts him long enough for his roommate to free her. The movie builds to a fascinatingly bloody and gory finale. It is a magnificent horror movie in its own right, but that's it for GIMP. There's a part of me that wanted that scene to last longer and go farther, but actually it was just explicit enough and just long enough to blow my mind.