Hell Ride trailer

What do young outlaw bikers from the ‘60s and ‘70s do when they’ve become a bit long in the tooth? They make a Quentin Tarantino movie!

Actually, this is directed by, and stars, Larry Bishop as Pistolero, “Pres” of a biker gang called the Victors. Basically, it’s about their conflict with a rival gang, the 666-ers. It's meant to be a throwback to the old biker-exploitation flicks of bygone years, but it delivers far more violence and nudity than those oldies even pretended to offer.

It also features absurdly overheated dialogue, peyote-induced hallucinations, naked female oil-wrestling, awesome chicks like Leonor Varela, shootin’, fightin’, boozin’, cussin’, boss hogs, a bitchin’ Mustang, Leonor Varela as the bitch in the Mustang, corpse-strewn highways, retro tunes from sources like Heavy, Hell’s Belles and Wild Angels, late great road warriors Dennis Hopper and David Carradine (in bondage!), and as Nada, Leonor Varela.

But does it have any GIMPage? Sorta.

There’s a brief scene, told in flashback, in which a woman is tied to a chair. “She’s gotta burn,” an unidentified voice says, but unfortunately, her unseen assailants have slashed her throat. Now, I always thought that this resulted in immediate death, but I guess I’m naïve about such things. She’s still alive, but so out of it that she cannot react to her impending doom as they soak her with gasoline. When they finally toss the cig lighter in her direction, the screen is lit up by a bright flash that fades into the present. This would have been a nice pyro scenario if the victim had been able to scream or mmmph or struggle futilely against her bonds. Dunderheads.