A Bring Out the GIMP (Girls in Merciless Peril) Movie Review


3 Mainstream Reviews

Reviewed by Dave


Well, I have rented a few movies recently, and I thought I would share either my elation or disappointment with their GIMP worthiness.

I'm primarily into mainstream movies, so that will be the focus of my reviews. I'll start off with three movies: Carver, Timber Falls AND The Blood of Fu Manchu.

First, however, let me clarify what makes a great GIMP scene for me. First the damsel should be restrained in some way. Second, there should be some nudity or skin. Third is "the setup" how she got there needs to be convincing. Fourth, the acting needs to be somewhat believable, and finally, there needs to be some peril!

Carver (2008): There are two potential GIMP scenes here, and neither of them lives up to potential. The first involves a fine looking blond with big tits and firm round ass. She is wearing a tight white tank tee, and a pair of skimpy panties that ride nicely up her crack. She is chased through the woods by the killer (plenty of nice jiggling here), and ends up in a farmhouse. There is a struggle and she is knocked semiconscious. As she lies there he grabs a hammer and pulls a nail out of a board lying on the ground.

He then proceeds to nail her ankle... pull out the nail, her knee, etc. She screams the entire time, but is not restrained, and seems to just lay there and let him "nail" her. No "interesting" parts are nailed, no clothes are ripped off, and the scene ends abruptly when he nails her in the forehead and kills her. Ack!

The second scene involves a pretty brunette. Initially she is wearing jeans and a jacket before she is knocked unconscious by the killer. The next time she is seen, her clothes have been changed (NOT SHOWN!!!) and she is tied to a chair, legs to each chair leg, hands behind back, and she is wearing a white taffeta dress. Shades of Hostel!! Oh boy! At this point she struggles until she falls over, and the chair breaks apart. She escapes her bondage, finds a shot gun and ends up killing the killer. Then, when she sees her friends "carved up", she puts the shotgun in her mouth and pulls the trigger... WTF???

Blood of Fu Manchu (1968): This one actually has some nice scenes, but once again fails to live up to potential. There are a bevy of beautiful babes, scantily clad, and in peril, but this movie somehow fails to even have one great GIMP scene.

The movie starts of with 10 woman marching through the jungle, clothes ripped and hanging off, hands chained behind their backs, and linked neck to neck by chains! What a great start! They are taken to Fu Manchu's secret hideout in the amazon jungle, where they learn that they will become assassins...and check out the assassination method...they are each bitten by a poisonous snake, but don't seem to have any ill effect from it...however, when they kiss a man after that, he dies. (I kid you not) So, they are going to kill Fu's 10 greatest enemies, and...aw, who cares?

There are scenes with the women in skimpy white cotton shifts and nothing else, chained in their cells. There's even a scene with a completely naked girl chained AOH in her cell... but she's just background, and nothing happens to her.

Another girl is chained with her arms wide and sideways to the cell bars, her top ripped off, and then killed by being bitten by a poisonous snake to the chest. However, the scene is not convincing at all, and there is no blood from the bite, and it's poorly acted, etc.

Timber Falls (2008): Well, I seemed to hit the trifecta of "GIMP potential" this last week, and this one caps it all off. There are two women in this movie that get the treatment and both are scenes are stupid. I guess when the plot is so lame, it kind of kills it for me. The movie starts off with an attractive woman lying on her back, in a poorly lit "dungeon" type setting, her legs tied spread to stirrups, and her hands NAILED down spread over head to the table...great start! However, nothing happens, she is dressed in a dress, and there is no nudity... argh!

She then proceeds to escaped by ripping her hands away from the nails... a cringe inducing moment I must admit. She's chased through to woods by some deformed lunatic, chased off a cliff and dies... Damn it!

The next chick along with her boyfriend are captured by the crazies in the woods. She is skinny dipping (only a brief ass shot from far away before she gets in the water) when she is captured. However she is in a dress and not naked when seen again. The crazies want children, so they capture the "sinners" in the woods, marry them, and torture them to have sex so the woman will get pregnant and give said crazy lady the child she always wanted but can't have herself... WTF????

Anyway, the girl spends most of the rest of the movie tied to the table, feet spread in stirrups, in the dress, arms tied (not nailed) overhead. At one point, to try and convince her boyfriend (now her "husband" because the crazies married them) to cooperate and fuck her the crazy potential mom cuts off the girl's pinkie. Graphically shown. Yawn.

There is a decent scene when the girl tries to escape. The mutant son comes in and catches her, bends her over the table, pulls up her dress and rips off her panties...giving us a brief ass shot. The father comes in and breaks it up before anything happens (Damn it all to hell!). However, why was she wearing panties to begin with?? They had just spent the last several days trying to convince the boyfriend to fuck his girlfriend while she was tied to the table. I'm sure it would have been much easier without the panties!

Anyway, folks, there you have it...three movies that appear to have a lot of GIMP appeal, but in the end, fail to deliver.







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