This was one of the movies I downloaded while I was a member of Bizarro Video in late 2008. The web site purports to be the "Home of the REAL ROUGH XXX and CULT GRINDHOUSE FILMS!" and while I am more interested in the REAL ROUGH XXX aspect of their movies, I occasionally mistakenly watch a CULT GRINDHOUSE FILM instead. Alas, such is the case with Pretty Peaches.

We pick up immediately with two good 'ol boys screeching to a halt in front of a dilapidated gas station. The passenger gets out and gives the driver a hard time for turning off the engine. The driver cranks it back up while the passenger opens the hood and sticks his head under it, then pulls his head back out and smacks the side of the car. The driver gets out and tells him not to hit his car as the passenger walks off and comes back with a water hose. He spashes water onto the driver's boots, who gets all upset and takes the hose away and fills up a canteen. Cut to the dufus in the gas station, who bears a passing resemblance to the dim-witted guy from I Spit on Your Grave (maybe it's just the hat), who gets all upset that these guys are wasting water because don't they know there's a water shortage? Like they could give a shit. There is the threat of redneck violence until a Jeep comes screeching to a halt and Desiree Cousteau, in a bright orange outfit that is struggling vainly to cover her crotch and has totally given up on covering her luscious butt, hops out and brightly asks if they can check her oil. Wink-wink nudge-nudge.

The camera spends a lot of time documenting Desiree Cousteau's ability to bounce and sashay and generally act like a clueless slut. And Desiree has never looked sluttier, in her bright orange short-shorts and too-high heels. Watching her just in these few introductory minutes takes me back to the Golden Age of Porn. *sigh*

She goes to the Ladies' Room. The dufus wipes down her windshield and sniffs her car seat. She returns dressed in a short pink dress and announces she's going to her Daddy's wedding. We see her Daddy (played by John Leslie) with his slutty bride-to-be, Lilly (played by Flower, who the IMDB tells me was only in two movies and somehow also the Legends of Porn compilation). We see Peaches (Desiree Cousteau) driving to town. Cut to credits, which is just the title (Alex de Renzy's Pretty Peaches).

Daddy gets married. Peaches arrives at the end of the ceremony. They all step next door and feed coins into slot machines. Peaches drinks too much and drives off upset. Why is not clear. She drives off the road right where the two good 'ol boys from the intro scene are trying to start their car, out in the big middle of nowhere. She stumbles out of the Jeep and collapses. The good 'ol boys find her and wonder what to do. Give me a break.

One of the guys decides to check for a heartbeat, so he slips his hand down the front of her dress, cups her breast, and announces that she's alive. The other guy wants to be sure, so he pulls her bodice down to expose her breast and, umm, feels for a heartbeat. They compare notes and conclude that since both of them feel a heartbeat--the second guy for quite a while longer than the first guy--she must be alive. What to do, what to do.

They decide maybe they should loosen her clothes because one guy saw that once on TV. Probably Dukes of Hazzard. They loosen her top until her breasts are exposed. They decide her panties are way too tight, and need to come off.

They admire her pussy. One guy does some exploring with his tongue, then explores her pussy with his cock. He explores her thoroughly and repeatedly and she stays passed out the entire time. Until she reaches up and grabs his butt and pulls him into her harder. And licks her lips. And kisses him back. This would have been so much better if she had waken up screaming and struggling and crying rape.

It turns out Peaches has amnesia. Poor Peaches. They offer to take her with them in "their Jeep" and off they go, to San Francisco.

Back to Daddy and his slutty bride, who is whining about the flea bag motel in which she is spending her honeymoon. Daddy is worried about Peaches. Lilly comes out in an orange lingerie outfit. Alex de Renzy must like the color orange. What follows is an uninspiring XXX sex scene. Flower looks kind of like a tranny, but apparently she is not. This part reminds me why I don't actually miss the Golden Age of Porn all that much. (There's lots of hair, too, and you know how I feel about copious body, facial and pubic hair.)

The Jeep arrives in San Francisco. Peaches is in a different dress, having evidently changed on the road in the open-topped Jeep, I guess. They send her into a building to see their uncle to get her memory back. She is pulled into a bathroom by Uncle Percy, who looks like a blond-haired Weird Al Yankovic. The following scene is supposed to be slapstick humor, I'm sure. And to the sound of slapstick movie music, Uncle Percy bends Desiree Cousteau over the sink and gives her an enema. She even holds the tube up her ass. When he pulls it out, she squirts herself empty. But she didn't get her memory back.

Peaches goes home with the redneck guys. Daddy and her slutty bride get home and we meet Katia, the maid (played by Juliet Anderson), in her French Maid outfit. Katia is not happy about the new mistress of the house. We suffer through another XXX sex scene with Daddy and Lilly, but Katia joins in. There is also typical 70s porn soundtrack music to deal with.

Peaches is in bed with the redneck twins and keeps getting annoyed that they are always feeling her up. She gets out of bed and the guys fight. Peaches reads the classifieds and finds an ad for exotic dancing.

Cut to Peaches' audition. She strips for the club owner. He gives her a torn slip, she puts it on, and he tells her the audition begins now. Peaches decides maybe she doesn't want the job, but two more gals come in and talk about how Peaches has been a bad girl and needs to be punished. And it has taken 48 minutes to get to this point.

Peaches is pushed back onto a round padded stage or bed or something, struggling and fighting all the while. She is held down while one guy (or girl) eats her out. Meanwhile, the club owner is taking money as people file in to watch. By the time everyone backs away, Peaches has her wrists chained out to the sides and up, and her ankles are chained up in the air with her legs spread. She struggles nicely, and cries out and acts like she knows what's coming next. (We hope she's right, but we are destined to be disappointed.)

One girl sits on her face and forces her to munch carpet. A one point, in fact, the girl takes hold of her own pussy lips and spreads them open and it looks like she could have covered the whole bottom half of Desiree Cousteau's face if she had tried hard enough. Kind of yuck, unless huge gaping pussies are your thing.

The other girl pushes a rubber dildo inside Peaches' pussy. There's a lot of orgy type action that goes on. And on. It is chaotic at best. No one actually fucks the bound and helpless Peaches, though. At the climax of the action, I think we are supposed to believe that they forced a large rubber cock the size of a small python up Peaches' pussy, but come on. This is XXX sex. If they had shoved that into her, we would have seen it. And we didn't. The scene concludes with Peaches crying out (kind of whining loudly), still chained to the bed, while the players file out. Very unsatisfying as gang rape scenes go. No gags were used, although I got tired enough of her whining that I was wishing they would employ one.

When Peaches gets back to the redneck twins, they have each hooked up with their own blonde. More XXX sex. All consensual. Ho hum. After the boring sex, Peaches storms out in a light blue (or lavender maybe) halter top and bright green satin shorts (I guess they couldn't afford a competent wardrobe person). We see her walking across the grass in her high heels, but we hear loafers on pavement. (I guess they couldn't afford a competent sound person, either.)

More insipid plot, in which Peaches hooks up with a psychiatrist who has sex with her. There is kind of a notable orgy scene with everyone rolling around in oil. Desiree Cousteau looks hot all oiled up. It is all consensual sex, unfortunately, except that it ends up with Peaches sucking her Daddy's cock. I saw THAT one coming (so to speak). Peaches gets her memory back (I will resist the urge to say that it just suddenly came to her), and hugs her naked oiled-up Daddy in the middle of the orgy. I guess it's a good thing she's dating a psychiatrist.

So, in summary, there's a scene where an unconscious Desiree Cousteau is undressed and fucked by the redneck guy, although in her semi-conscious state toward the end she is enthusiastically involved. It would have been better, of course, if it had been a forcible rape. There's the kind of forced enema scene, complete with a gushing finale. Then there's the bondage gang rape scene, which wasn't all that bad except that the most that happened to her was that she was eaten out and was smothered by a HUGE pussy. No guys fucked her at all. I'm not even sure a gal with a strap-on fucked her. So it was technically a rape scene, although thoroughly unsatisfying. But she did look nice chained naked with her legs spread up in the air. And then there was the incest scene. Personally, incest scenes don't do much for me. But Desiree Cousteau did look kind of hot all oiled up.

So one kind of unconscious rape and one unsatisfying bondage gang rape. One kind of forced enema. As a GIMP movie, this gets a D+. As a funky 70s XXX cult flick, it would score higher.